Script

To clarify

If you're not quite sure what your stakeholders are asking, don't make assumptions. Get clarity. And if you do make assumptions, vet them immediately. Here's how.

"Sorry to interrupt. I want to make sure we've got clarity before we move forward. Are you saying 'X'? Did I get that right?"

"Do you mind if I stop you/I'm going to stop you for a sec and ask a few questions to make sure we're on the same page."

"I'd like to slow down and revisit a few conversation points to get things back on track. When you mentioned 'X' and 'Y,' can you explain a little more about what you meant? Let's start with 'X'…"

"I want to pause a beat here and look at some high-level pieces so we can see where we're at in this situation. Let's start with goals…"

"It sounds like you're saying 'X,' but if that's not right, can you loop me back to how you came to this position and walk me through again? I want to give this my full attention and understanding."

"You know what? After looking at the data/schedule/scope/budget, I don't think it makes sense to do 'X.' I'm sorry I wasn't clear before. Do you want to talk about other options?"

"I was wrong when I said 'X.' It's actually 'Y.' Sorry about that. I'd love to go over the details so we're aligned on what happened since we last chatted. I want to make sure you're included in the process."

"Let's take some time to sit down and make sure nothing has shifted since our last chat. It's really important that our team is completely aligned together."

Script

To maneuver control

If you feel like your stakeholders are taking the reins, it's time to pull them back. Here are some ways to speak candidly and take the power into your own hands.

"I hear what you are saying. Before we get too much further, let's back up and reinforce some of our goals and why we're here. Otherwise, we're going down the wrong track."

"This is hard, but I need your help. In order for this direction to work, we have to focus on the right things. Can you help me by prioritizing what's important to you? Let's summarize where we're at so we can see where we need to focus our attention."

"I want to give you my full attention, but first I need you to do the same for me. Let's figure this out together. I have a few things we need to talk about first and then I'm completely here to listen."

Script

To influence

Need to change some minds? Here are some wise words to help you convert even the biggest stickler.

"You know what? I think you're onto something. I have some ideas, too. Do you think we can see how they might align—or how these ideas could potentially take us in a good direction? I'm focusing on how they'll help us achieve our goals. Let's talk through them and if you want more time, we can dig in deeper."

"I'd like to try this and I want your blessing, but I think regardless if this project will succeed, the benefits outweigh the risks. Here's how…"

"Let's try this. If we're wrong, we'll eat it, but if we're right, let's look at some ways that this can bring you value/be good for you, too."

"What's your biggest worry or fear in trying this? How do we make sure that this feels like a safe option to try?"

"I've got support from the whole team on this and we're excited to give it a try. Can you greenlight this? We'll keep you in the loop as we go, and if you're not feeling good, we can talk through it together."

Script

To cover your butt

It never fails: in any project lead's life comes a time to cover some butts. Here's how to cover yours.

"Here's the current situation. This is what you have said/done/noted/communicated (bullet points). Here's the plan we've outlined for how we'd like to move forward to reinforce project goals. How do you want to proceed? [responding with a written response is a sign off]."

"Here's what we've done to date. Here's what we plan to do next. Do I have permission to move forward?"

"This is hard for me: I don't agree with the direction, but ultimately you have to make the decision and own the outcome. Can you sign off on this, please?"

"Here are the steps we've taken to ensure 'X'. I recognize things don't feel good and we're a team, so we're committed to finding the best possible outcome. How would you like to handle this?"

"This is different than our earlier conversations, so let's make sure we chat and get in sync. If we change direction, we'll be impacting our project goals and that will impact our team—not to mention our timeline and budget."

Script

To promote alignment

Internal alignment with your teams and any decision makers on your projects is fundamental to completing a successful project. Here's a few scripts for getting disparate ideas in line.

Use words like these to put the "we" in team:

• "Team"
• "We/our"
• "Together"

Use these scripts to promote alignment:

"Can you help me?"

"I need your help."

"Let's do this/figure this out as a team."

"What works best for this product and our team?"

"How can we make sure we're both clear on what needs to happen?"

"How can we make sure we get your feedback throughout the project for next time?"

"How can we work best together?"

"How can we make sure this works?"

"What do you picture when you think of how we could work together better?"

"We're working as a team to make better processes, and want to find out from you how we can work better together."

"This is what we need to move forward..."

"Here's what I'm feeling/noticing/experiencing…"

"Here's what I noticed and what I'd like to change/adjust..."

"This is what's got me concerned…"

"Here's the business case for how this impacts our delivery..."

"In order to move forward, we're going to need to [action/consequence]."

"This is what would be really helpful for us…"

"Let's [action with clear outcomes]"

"Here's what we can do…"

"What happens if you sit down with your [team/stakeholder/execs] to see if you can agree on the why/how/what of your organization? How difficult does this feel?"

"How are you feeling about alignment in your organization right now? Do people want the same things?"

"I just want to check to see that we're aligned…[restate feedback in stakeholder's words]"

"How can we support your alignment so we can get to the finish line?"

"What needs to happen next to make sure we're aligned on what we should be creating?"

"Sometimes when we see feedback that takes the project in opposite directions, it means that clients/stakeholders aren't aligned on their goals or next steps...what do you think the next step should be?"

"Here's what our team sees happening: path A will lead to [X outcome]; path B will lead to [Y outcome]. Which path aligns most with your goals to do [goal description]?"

Script

To make and monitor changes

The key here is recognizing the words, phrases and body language your stakeholders use when they're asking for change. When you hear their cue, it's time for your response. In time, you'll be writing your own and sharing them with all the apprentices that come after you. You got this.

Say 'no'

You can offer a soft no or a hard one. Instead of a hard no, leave a bit of room for future expansion of ideas, but if you're tight on your launch window or have other projects ready to go, you can say no flat out. Notice the difference in the phrases below?

"Hmm, it sounds like this idea might pull us further away from your goals. It's a bit risky. Mind if we come back to it later when there's time?"

"You know what, we've tried this in the past and here's what happened. We'd recommend against it, but if the concept is something important to you, put it in the ideas list and we'll come back to it next phase and refine it."

"Unfortunately, that's going to take us in the wrong direction/cost more money and take more time. Let's focus on launching/iterating/revising what we have and we can come back to it later if it makes sense."

"It sounds like this is really important to your stakeholders/audience. Right now we don't have the time to build that feature in if we want to launch on time. Let's move ahead with what we've got and chat if those priorities become more important than our current direction."

Say 'maybe' if you're not sure

If you don't know the answer, don't sweat it. Buy yourself some time. In fact, make sure you're clear before you verbally commit to something or you'll have to push back harder later.

"I'd like to say yes, but I have multiple priorities. Which of the following things is most important and which can be downgraded?"

"Let me go back to my team and I'll get you an answer on that."

"Can I have some time to think this over and get back to you? I want to make sure we've considered all the options."

"You know what? I don't have a good answer for you at the moment, but this is important. I will go back and get one for you."

"Great question. Let me have some time to put a great answer together for you."

"This might work, but to be sure I'd want to check the schedule and check with our team. Can I get back to you?"

Say 'yes, but/and…'

Turn requests into additional features or outcomes and charge for them. If you're an internal team, delay scope requests till they make sense.

"Is this the most important thing we should be focusing on? Even over thing 'X'? If yes, I'm happy to switch priorities. Here's how it will impact us."

"If we do 'X,' it will add time and budget—let's look at how much and then we can decide if it makes sense."

"Great question. This will add some time and budget and we'll have to re-prioritize to meet your goals. Would you like to add this to the ideas list so we can come back to it?"

"We can do that. To meet your goals by [date/time], we'll need to [action]. Does that work for you?"

"We can accommodate your request. We'd like to review how this impacts existing features to find the most efficient approach. We'll get back to you with options and then you can decide."

"Happy to do that! We'd be grateful for a bit more time to get it right. Let's take [X time] and get back to you with a plan."